Panic attacks

What an awful feeling these horrible little episodes are, and yesterday I had one. I don't know what causes them or triggers them, I researched and practice all the exercises and the talking my self out of them and sometimes it works and sometimes it doesn't? I have had tests done such as the tilt table test (which was absolutely horrible because they make you have an episode and then keep it going to see what your heart and blood pressure do) and am just told its syncope or vasovagal, a so called medical condition that some people have triggered by the unknown that makes the blood flow to the brain slow down, which bring on the symptoms of light headiness and dizziness, which then in turn the body realizes that somethings wrong and starts to panic. There are also exercises they have told me to do to keep that from happening and sometimes it works and sometimes it doesn't? The obvious things like standing up to fast or spinning I completely avoid. But how do you avoid the situations where you don't know what triggers it? Yesterday I got Riley off to school and Cody off to preschool and started driving down the Cheney highway to head to walmart to get some groceries. I turned off the highway and on to the on ramp onto the freeway, and instantly started to feel light headed and of course being on the freeway and thinking of my sisters crash on the freeway head on into a tree due to her having a seizure, and the long recovery she had, I instantly started to panic and thought, what do I do? should I pull over before I pass out, or am I just being ridiculous. So I start trying to talk my self out of it and flexing my legs and arms, cause I was told that would help push more blood to the brain, and I make it to an exit and get off and pull into a McDonald's parking lot and I am shaking and starting to cry, so I go to call my husband but he doesn't answer, then I try each of my sisters and they don't answer, and I start to feel panicky again, when my phone rings and its my husband. I tell him I am in a McDonald's parking lot and I am having a panic attack! He talks to me and calms me down, after sitting there and calming down for 30 minutes I start to feel better and I tell him that I am going to continue on to walmart to get groceries. I probably should have just gone home, but It was my window to get groceries with out interruptions while the kids were in school. I manage to make it to walmart and start shopping, again I start to feel light headed and dizzy and freezing cold! I make it to the bread Isle and my eyes start to see white, I fumble through my purse to find my phone and as I am doing so I can see how white my hands and finger tips are which just makes me panic more, I lean on the cart and call my husband again, as the phone is ringing I am realizing that people are staring at me but no one is coming over to ask if I need help? Then I start to think how sad is our world that people cant trust others even to walk over to see if someone is okay? Thinking that though helped calm me down, why? I don't know maybe because it got my mind off of how I was feeling? Corey answered the phone and I asked if he could come and get me, I was in the bread isle and I just keep feeling like I am going to pass out and I just cant talk my self out of it, I walk out to the car trying not to hyperventilate myself and completely embarrassed because people are still staring at me probably thinking I am on drugs or something, and lay down in the car until Corey gets there, as I am laying in the car I manage to get Melissa on the phone to talk to me until Corey gets there, her, Jessy and Corey always make me feel more calmer and help talk me out of it. Corey gets there and takes me to the chiropractor, because for some reason there is a connection with my neck being jammed up and me feeling light headed, my chiro says that it can pinch off certain nerves and blood flows even when your neck is unaligned, so he adjusts me and off course it feels like instant relief and then I go home to lay down and let my body recover from the stress I just put it through. What causes them and triggers them, I don't know? Maybe its as simple as my neck being out of alignment, maybe its certain memories? who knows, But one thing I do know is that many people suffer from them and they are absolutely the most horrible feeling ever for me:( I suffered from them when I was young, my first one I remember happening was one morning when my mom was braiding my hair, I'm sure it was from standing with my knees locked and then led to a panic attack because my body wasn't understanding what it was feeling, but then it grew from there, I would have them in school and my mom would have to come and pick me up. I am sure during those times it was more emotional stress, my mother and father divorced at an early age and it was a very nasty divorce and remained nasty up until we were 18 and they didn't have to deal with each other any more, and also the fact that my mother has insecurities of being alone and married four times to men that were lets just say not the best of choices. So when I think about it I think my anxiety stemmed from there, then I met Corey and we moved away to Georgia. Amazingly enough all anxiety left me, I did not have one panic attack from the years 1998 to 2003. Then after my first born they started up again, my theory is a mix between my neck being out and the new worry of my babies, always a fear of if they will be okay, what if I die and they have to grow up without a mother, or what if they got kidnapped. I completely bring it on my self I guess. Thinking about the one from yesterday now that I am writing this, I probably started feeling dizzy because my neck was out and then I thought of the memory of Melissa crashing on the freeway and then I was forced with a decision of should I pull over or not, and then my mind started to think well you better decide because if you don't your going to pass out while driving and crash! And it just spiraled down from there.